Perplex City event announced, perplexingly scheduled

The front page of Perplex City’s leading “newspaper” currently says the following: “The Academy and Mind Candy have announced plans for a celebration to inaugurate the opening of a new data connection to Earth. The event is planned for mid-August in San Francisco, in the United States. Cube hunters from around the world will be invited to attend the festivities.” Uhhh… mid-August? Apparently they have no word for “Gen Con” in Perplex City. Nor for “half of your player base will be in the Midwest,” or “tight travel budget.” Possibly not even for “dammit.”